I have decided to take a bold step forward and write about it. Some of my interesting life experiances.About Something which generally make some people frustrated or in some cases even desperate. The infamous "status"..........Yes you guessed it right. I am going to write about being single!
" Com'on! why is it such a big deal? i am only 25 years old, i am still young, i have a lot of time left to think about relationships or marriage", i told one of persons from the older generation who was extremely concerned about my single status.
" There is a different way of looking at it", she said, "you have completed 25 years and your 26th year is running.Soon you will complete your 26th year and your 27th year will start running.At your age i was married and had two kids and was taking care of the whole family!!!".
" Yea yea. I know. You wasted your life getting married at such a young age. And i decided not to make the same mistake. You should appreciate my wisdom!", i replied back to her. She started grumbling," What is this wisdom i dont understand. When will you think about it? when u get old and all your black hair turns grey?! You are living life like a nomad, travelling from one place to another. I am telling you,settle down in life!!"
Over the years ofcourse i have learnt how to deal with the older generation and their standard advise about "Life settlement". For an average indian girl( belonging to a rather modern family), this topic starts at an age of 23.The simple tactic is to smile to whatever they say and turn a deaf ear to the repeated advise.
But then...the story is not that simple.And life is not that easy, especially if you are a 25 year old indian girl, who is single and not really prepared to "settle down" in life.Infact i have realised that it is much easier to deal with the infamous older generation as compared to your own peers....
" You know what..i am telling you. Its high time you find someone for yourself. How long can you live alone like this?", said one of my close friend.
" Yea. i will see. It will all happen when it has to. I dont want to push it hard", i replied back to him.
" Ok then fine. As long as you dont have someone i have the right to flirt with you........so Honey.. just you, me, a candlelight dinner with some good wine....and ofcourse some good music, What say you???", he asked.
" Whoahhh, i never knew your romantic side!And I am completely flattered by your offer. Sad that you have a girlfriend. Otherwise i would have ofcourse considered accepting this magnanemous heart", i said laughing back.
" You dont worry about my girlfriend. I will take care of her. You just say yes, and i will take of the rest", he said. ( "Yea well, so i have an offer now", i thought.But decided to decline the date offer.)
I met some friends who studied with me after 3 years. I was so happy to meet them and we were catching up the spicy bits about each of our lives from the lost years. So when i told that i finished my masters and plan to start my PhD in another country and that i knew no one over there, my friends started," Are yaar. How long will you keep studying?!! Settle down in life. Get married!"....I was rather dissapointed to hear this from them.
"Hey, this is unfair.", i said, " I can expect to hear this from an elderly person..But you guys are of my age. I was expecting more support from you...".
They replied back," we are just concerned about you yaar. Why do you want to go and live alone in some place you know no one and that too for 3 years! Thats sounds frustrating".
"Dont you think it is exciting. It will be a complete new experiance. New culture, new people, new life. Trust me, its not so bad", i replied back. But somehow they were not so excited of the prospect....
My friend and i were chatting about some new movie releases. He was a huge fan of the bollywood actress Katrina Kaif. " She is so hot. She is the dream girl of every guy. I can watch any of her movies just for her sake!", he said.
" Really?? I find her so annoying. She cannot act for nuts. She and her irritating hindi accent", i replied back. He burst out laughing and i didnt understand why..." what is so funny about what i said?" I asked him.
" Well, from this statement of yours, i have finally confirmed that you are not a lesbian.You dont like Katrina...so its proof enough that you are straight..Hahahaha".
Idiot! i could not believe my ears. He had doubts about my sexual preference since i was still single.." I dont know if it can get worse than this!!!", i thought....
My good friend pinged me after almost two months of no contact.Two months back she had asked me, " So wats new? Found someone? Or thought about marriage?". And i gave the same standard reply..." Nothing new. life is going on as usual. No, no plans of marriage as of now".
After two months, she asked me the same questions. I was amazed how hopeful she was about quick developments in my life in just two months. But to her dissappointment, she got the same reply from me. This time she said, " You know, i heard that people who delay their first pregnancy have a higher chance of having health problems in the future"..
I was puzzled by this sudden gyan from her..." Why are you telling me this now?", i asked her.
" Nothing...i just want you to keep this in mind", she said. ( Well Thankyou. Point noted down!)
I caught up with an old friend after almost 3 years on skype.We went about asking each other watz up in life..I asked him, " So how are your Eena Meena Deeka, all the female fans you had back in college??". He replied back," Dont ask me...its a long story. Right now i am single and am sorry to be one"..
I told him, " Com'on, why should be you be sorry. I am single and i am a happy single. I dont understand this frustration".
He replied back, " You are a girl, i am a guy...its completely different. You wont understand".... (Huh?? I really didnt understand so i just dropped the subject then and there.)
These real-life incidences my friends, are just the tip of the iceberg.There were many many more things i have heard. The latest one being one of the persons i know wanting to click pictures of me and when i asked why said, " You are getting old. Its high time you settle down. I want to click some nice pictures of you which you can put on shaadi.com . Just see, after this you will get confirmed alliances!".. ( Grhrhhhhh!!!).
So if you are a single women, your friends always worry about you, Most guys think it is ideal to flirt with you, the older generation wants you to get married and have a man to take care of you, but worst of all.........The girlfriends of your guy friends hate you!!
But there is a silver-lining to the cloud...When i travelled around to different coutries, i met a few women, in their early or mid-thirties. Single and very happy with their lives. They ofcourse face the very same problems which i face...But they told me how they have learnt to live with it and take life as it comes." Be ready for changes, and be ready to be swept by the wave of love. When the time is ripe, things happen on their own. Until then, enjoy your life, cherish the time you are single. For all you know you might miss this very time you have for yourself when you finally start a family......"
" There is a different way of looking at it", she said, "you have completed 25 years and your 26th year is running.Soon you will complete your 26th year and your 27th year will start running.At your age i was married and had two kids and was taking care of the whole family!!!".
" Yea yea. I know. You wasted your life getting married at such a young age. And i decided not to make the same mistake. You should appreciate my wisdom!", i replied back to her. She started grumbling," What is this wisdom i dont understand. When will you think about it? when u get old and all your black hair turns grey?! You are living life like a nomad, travelling from one place to another. I am telling you,settle down in life!!"
Over the years ofcourse i have learnt how to deal with the older generation and their standard advise about "Life settlement". For an average indian girl( belonging to a rather modern family), this topic starts at an age of 23.The simple tactic is to smile to whatever they say and turn a deaf ear to the repeated advise.
But then...the story is not that simple.And life is not that easy, especially if you are a 25 year old indian girl, who is single and not really prepared to "settle down" in life.Infact i have realised that it is much easier to deal with the infamous older generation as compared to your own peers....
" You know what..i am telling you. Its high time you find someone for yourself. How long can you live alone like this?", said one of my close friend.
" Yea. i will see. It will all happen when it has to. I dont want to push it hard", i replied back to him.
" Ok then fine. As long as you dont have someone i have the right to flirt with you........so Honey.. just you, me, a candlelight dinner with some good wine....and ofcourse some good music, What say you???", he asked.
" Whoahhh, i never knew your romantic side!And I am completely flattered by your offer. Sad that you have a girlfriend. Otherwise i would have ofcourse considered accepting this magnanemous heart", i said laughing back.
" You dont worry about my girlfriend. I will take care of her. You just say yes, and i will take of the rest", he said. ( "Yea well, so i have an offer now", i thought.But decided to decline the date offer.)
I met some friends who studied with me after 3 years. I was so happy to meet them and we were catching up the spicy bits about each of our lives from the lost years. So when i told that i finished my masters and plan to start my PhD in another country and that i knew no one over there, my friends started," Are yaar. How long will you keep studying?!! Settle down in life. Get married!"....I was rather dissapointed to hear this from them.
"Hey, this is unfair.", i said, " I can expect to hear this from an elderly person..But you guys are of my age. I was expecting more support from you...".
They replied back," we are just concerned about you yaar. Why do you want to go and live alone in some place you know no one and that too for 3 years! Thats sounds frustrating".
"Dont you think it is exciting. It will be a complete new experiance. New culture, new people, new life. Trust me, its not so bad", i replied back. But somehow they were not so excited of the prospect....
My friend and i were chatting about some new movie releases. He was a huge fan of the bollywood actress Katrina Kaif. " She is so hot. She is the dream girl of every guy. I can watch any of her movies just for her sake!", he said.
" Really?? I find her so annoying. She cannot act for nuts. She and her irritating hindi accent", i replied back. He burst out laughing and i didnt understand why..." what is so funny about what i said?" I asked him.
" Well, from this statement of yours, i have finally confirmed that you are not a lesbian.You dont like Katrina...so its proof enough that you are straight..Hahahaha".
Idiot! i could not believe my ears. He had doubts about my sexual preference since i was still single.." I dont know if it can get worse than this!!!", i thought....
My good friend pinged me after almost two months of no contact.Two months back she had asked me, " So wats new? Found someone? Or thought about marriage?". And i gave the same standard reply..." Nothing new. life is going on as usual. No, no plans of marriage as of now".
After two months, she asked me the same questions. I was amazed how hopeful she was about quick developments in my life in just two months. But to her dissappointment, she got the same reply from me. This time she said, " You know, i heard that people who delay their first pregnancy have a higher chance of having health problems in the future"..
I was puzzled by this sudden gyan from her..." Why are you telling me this now?", i asked her.
" Nothing...i just want you to keep this in mind", she said. ( Well Thankyou. Point noted down!)
I caught up with an old friend after almost 3 years on skype.We went about asking each other watz up in life..I asked him, " So how are your Eena Meena Deeka, all the female fans you had back in college??". He replied back," Dont ask me...its a long story. Right now i am single and am sorry to be one"..
I told him, " Com'on, why should be you be sorry. I am single and i am a happy single. I dont understand this frustration".
He replied back, " You are a girl, i am a guy...its completely different. You wont understand".... (Huh?? I really didnt understand so i just dropped the subject then and there.)
These real-life incidences my friends, are just the tip of the iceberg.There were many many more things i have heard. The latest one being one of the persons i know wanting to click pictures of me and when i asked why said, " You are getting old. Its high time you settle down. I want to click some nice pictures of you which you can put on shaadi.com . Just see, after this you will get confirmed alliances!".. ( Grhrhhhhh!!!).
So if you are a single women, your friends always worry about you, Most guys think it is ideal to flirt with you, the older generation wants you to get married and have a man to take care of you, but worst of all.........The girlfriends of your guy friends hate you!!
But there is a silver-lining to the cloud...When i travelled around to different coutries, i met a few women, in their early or mid-thirties. Single and very happy with their lives. They ofcourse face the very same problems which i face...But they told me how they have learnt to live with it and take life as it comes." Be ready for changes, and be ready to be swept by the wave of love. When the time is ripe, things happen on their own. Until then, enjoy your life, cherish the time you are single. For all you know you might miss this very time you have for yourself when you finally start a family......"
